How to use an ATM machine...

MALE PROCEDURE1. Drive up to cash machine. 2. Wind down your car window 3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw 5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt 6. Wind up window 7. Drive off. FEMALE PROCEDURE 1. Drive up to cash machine 2. Reverse back the required amount to align car window to machine 3. Re-start stalled engine4. Wind down the window5. Find handbag, remove all contents onto passenger seat to locate card 6. Locate make-up bag and check make-up in rear view mirror7. Attempt to insert card into machine 8. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from car 9. Insert card10. Re-insert card the right way up11. Re-enter handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page 12. Enter PIN13. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN14. Enter amount of cash required15. Re-check make-up in rear view mirror 16. Retrieve cash and receipt 17. Empty handbag again to locate purse and put cash inside18. Place receipt in back of cheque book 19. Re-check make-up again20. Drive forward two metres 21. Reverse back to cash machine22. Retrieve card 23. Re-empty handbag, locate card holder and place card into the slot provided24. Re-check make-up25. Re-start stalled engine and move off26. Drive for 3 - 4 miles27. Release hand brake