今天跟你分享的句子是：
Thank you for booking at The Bailey.
You are confirmed for four people at 7:30 P.M. on Friday, January
20th.
Before we welcome you to our restaurant, a few housekeeping
items, to insure that your visit with us is exceptional–and to avoid
misunderstandings.
Owing to COVID, RSV, the apparent return of polio,
inflation, the looming recession, and Donald Trump’s announcement of his 2024
run, your table reservation will be for ninety minutes exactly.
We offer a
fifteen-minute grace period for arrival, but the ninety minutes starts at the
reservation time.
To illustrate with an example, let’s say you arrive at 7:43 P.M.,
because your Uber driver was unfamiliar with the unmarked doors of our
speakeasy concept, and you wait in line awhile to hand your coat to our
coat-check person (twenty dollars per item; yes, a scarf counts as one item)
before settling into your table by 8 P.M.
You still need to leave by 9 P.M., because
we have another party coming in.
...
We seat only complete parties.
If you booked for a party of six and only five of you are present, do not--we repeat: do not--even think about coming through the door.
We also request that your party be complete emotionally.
If you are sad, stay home.
This is a restaurant, not a clinic.
🍏
- Anand Giridharadas, The New Yorker, Jan. 30, 2023.
注释：
RSV - Respiratory Syncytial Virus
Grace period for arrival - 预订晚到后餐厅仍在一定时间内保留预订
* * *
原本只想摘抄一两句的，结果我一边读一边笑，忍不住就摘抄了一大段。其实整篇文章都很赞，很喜欢这个作家的文字，但出于对作者版权的尊重，我不能摘录太多在这里分享。
有条件的读者可在下面的链接阅读全文：
https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2023/01/30/thank-you-for-your-reservation
你能领略到这段话的幽默吗？我是一路笑着读完这篇短文的，看完一遍马上又接着读了一遍。
有没有兴趣把这段话翻译成中文？欢迎留言分享你的译文。
翻译完你就体会到这个作者的幽默语调了。